Miss Cellania

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And this, fellow readers, is why Miss Cellania is probably the best writer we've ever had. A thing of beauty. -YesButNoButYes

...Miss Cellania who’s wonderfully funny and knowledgeable and also happens to write for Mental Floss. Her personal blog is updated as often as any multi-contributor blog site and has some wonderful gems... -Infinite Well

Miss Cellania has links, doctored-up photos staring Miss C. herself and YouTube videos from anywhere and everywhere on the internet. If it's funny, you'll probably see it first on her blog. -Suzanne Broughton

Miss Cellania has a site that is to die for. Whenever it’s time for a bit of a smile, interspersed with a gaffaw or two, I head on over there. -Compass Points

If you’re jonesing for more links you may want to visit Miss Cellania’s blog. Or should I say blogs. She’s like the blogosphere’s version of that Jamaican family from In Living Color. She has more blogs than they had jobs. If she starts contributing to one more blog I’m going to stage an intervention. -Cynical-C

I could never in a million years come up with half the wonderful facts, news, links et al that pepper every post she creates. -Mad Baggage

It’s a fantastic set of funny and interesting links, jokes and pictures that she compiled *every day*! -Neatorama

She finds the coolest, funniest stuff day after day. How on earth she does this I have no clue. -NYC Educator

I don't even know how I found Miss C, but I remember the first time I was there, I burned my chocolate chip cookies. I just couldn't stop browsing! Fun stuff over there. -Boomer Chick

If you're not regularly heading over and reading her well compiled, link-filled-goodness posts already, then maybe you should take a step back and do some self reflection and introspection to make sure your life is headed the direction it needs to be and that you're on a path that is fulfilling to you and your fellow man, as a person and as an American. -Hoodlumman

Funniest woman alive. -Pixie

It is quite possibly one of the most extensive sites I have seen for links to humourous content. It is a virtual encyclopedia for a myriad of different jokes on different topics and still growing. So a good site and worth checking out, theres definitely something for everyone, or anyone whos up for a laugh that is! -Mr. Joe Blog

BTW - you quite possibly put together the best, most well researched content on the web, bigtime kudos to you! -Anita B

One place I keep going back to is Miss Cellania. She really has it going on over there. Her posts are chock full of stuff I've never seen before, along with a few old favorites I had forgotten about. Anyone that can consistently come up with that much good stuff deserves kudos. -Blue Beaver Beer

Miss Cellania - is a great read, and there’s more than enough laughs to kill an evening with, on any given day. Miss C has her fingers on the pulse of every joke on the web that you haven’t seen yet. -Saskboy

(Funny, if a tad lowbrow) -Utopia Moment

Fabulous as usual..I appreciate all of the effort..and I am truly humbled. -Homo Escapeons

I'm not even sure why I thought her post is funny, but it is. That's all you're getting from me. Go read it. -konagod

YAY! Miss Cellania knows I'm alive!! -Fuzzy Dave

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« May 19 Links | Main | Golf Game »
Friday
18May2007

Chocolate and Coffee


Two great tastes that taste great together! I think that was originally something to do with peanut butter, possibly a Reece’s ad. But chocolate and coffee are the bomb. You’ve got the sweet and the bitter, both cleansing the palate for the next taste of the other. You’ve got caffeine to boost your system, and phenylethylamine to put a smile on your face. Chocolate will make you live longer and love better. Coffee has its health benefits, too. You’ve got a pot brewing right now, and a stash of Special Dark in the bottom desk drawer that the kids haven’t found yet. Life is good.

Instant Laser Coffee. I don’t know how safe this is, but it looks cool!

More good news: Coffee contains a good amount of dietary fiber! (Thanks, Ed!)

Even vegans can enjoy the benefits of chocolate!

The Java Wand filters your coffee while you sip! Handy if you just want to make one cup of coffee in a hurry, but still, sipping hot drinks through a straw is not the safest way to go, especially if you are in a hurry! (via the AV Club)

Hale McKay has a conversation with his coffee.

Mister Slippy wrote a coffee poem.

Coffee Addiction Quiz. (via Exploding Aardvark)

I was surprised my score was so low. But then again, I don't grind my own beans, and I'm not too picky about brand names, so that may explain it.

Chocolate shot glasses. (via Grow-A-Brain)

Starbucking. This guy wants to visit every Starbucks in the world, and made a movie about it. They build them faster than he can visit!

A Starbucks Barista really really hates her job. Or maybe just hates people. Anyway, this post sparked a lot of comments. And I certainly didn’t know there was a Starbucks Gossip blog! (via On the Other Foot)

THE NEW JOB

A man joined a big Multi National Company as a trainee.....

On his first day, he dialed the kitchen and shouted into the phone "Get me a cup of coffee, quickly!"

The voice from the other side responded "You fool, you've dialed the wrong extension! Do you know whom you're talking to?"

"No" replied the trainee..

"It's the Managing Director of the company, you idiot!"

The trainee shouted back "And do you know whom YOU are talking to, you IDIOT?"

"No!" replied the Managing Director angrily.

"Thank God....!!" replied the trainee and put down the phone.

Chocolate Ice Cream

A man approaches an ice cream van and asks, "I'd like two scoops of chocolate ice cream, please."

The girl behind the counter replied, "I'm very sorry, sir, but our delivery didn't come this morning. We're out of chocolate."

"In that case," the man continued, "I'll have two scoops of chocolate ice cream."

"You don't understand, sir," the girl says. "We have no chocolate."

"Then just give me some chocolate," he insists.

Getting angrier by the second, the girl asked, "Sir, will you spell 'van,' as in 'vanilla?'"

The man spells, "V A N."

"Now spell 'straw,' as in 'strawberry.'"

"OK. S-T-R-A-W."

"Now," the girl asked, "spell 'stink,' as in chocolate."

The man hesitates, then confused, replied, "There is no stink in chocolate."

"That's what I've been trying to tell you!" she screams.

SEX AND COFFEE

A women visited her doctor to ask his help in reviving her husband’s sex drive. "What about Viagra?" asks the Dr.

"Oh, I couldn't do that!" she said. "He won't even take aspirin!"

"Not a problem," said the doctor, "Drop it into his coffee. He won't even taste it. Give it a try and call me in a week!”

It wasn't even a week later that she called the doctor. The poor lady exclaimed, "Oh my, Doc! It was just terrible!"

"Really? What happened?"

"Well, I did like you said and slipped it into his coffee. The effect was almost immediate. He jumped straight up, with a twinkle in his eye and his pants bulging something fierce! With one swoop of his arm, he sent the coffee cups flying, ripped my clothes to tatters and then, he took me right then and there! Making wild mad passionate love to me on the table! It was terrible!"

"Why so terrible?” asked the doctor, “Do you mean it was not good?"

“No, no, Doc! It was great! But oh my, I'll never be able to show my face in Starbucks again!”

Yum.

Previously at Miss Cellania: Chocolate, Coffee, and Coffee and Chocolate.

Thought for today: I believe humans get a lot done, not because we're smart, but because we have thumbs so we can make coffee.  ~Flash Rosenberg

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Reader Comments (13)

Coffee! One of my favorite things, and chocolate too, yum. It's good to know there's something healthy in all this. "Chocolat" is one of my favorite films, I get to drool over all the scrumptious delights, including Johnny Depp! Well, I think I'll just toddle off to the kitchen for another cup of coffee, and let's see if we've got any chocolate lying around...
05.18.07 @ 06:45AM | Unregistered CommenterTheresa
Leave it to me to enjoy the both individually, and hate them in combo...it's dem danged three concussions, I tell ya..
05.18.07 @ 07:04AM | Unregistered CommenterSkunkfeathers
Chocolate Cappuccino. There's nothing else like it. Except maybe chai latte.
05.18.07 @ 10:04AM | Unregistered CommenterJacq
Coffee and chocolate.

I'm not seeing it. Sounds sucky, like mixing sex with watching a ball game. Each is fun in its own way, but together they just seem to grate.

Maybe that's because for me, coffee is fuel, and fuck Starbucks for ruining coffee for the world. That bland-yet-bitter, overpriced vente sucks the root, and so its no wonder folks need to mix more ingredients in it.
05.18.07 @ 10:18AM | Unregistered CommenterActor212
Hi Miss C, some good coffee stuff there, I missed Hales conversation with his "joe" somehow when he posted it.
05.18.07 @ 11:51AM | Unregistered CommenterPeter
As I mentioned in one or my own posts, girl scout thin mint cookies and a cappuccino is a religious experience!
05.18.07 @ 12:44PM | Unregistered CommenterLisaBinDaCity
Wonderful stuff coffee, it makes the world go round.

I like the poem too, I wish I'd written it.
05.18.07 @ 01:00PM | Unregistered CommenterOldGuy
I do my chocolate a little different now than I used to do. Now I put about half a cup of water in the microwave for a minute. Then I add two tsp of sugar and two heaping tsp of cocoa, stir, mix, and drink.

I still don't drink coffee much anymore, but two cups of green tea per day give me some caffeine.
05.18.07 @ 01:36PM | Unregistered CommenterEd
I have a love of both chocolate and coffee.... what is a fella to do?! ~ jb///
05.18.07 @ 03:34PM | Unregistered CommenterLAZY
Theresa:

The movie "Chocolat" is THE BEST!!!!! Juliette Binoche and Johnny Depp are both awesome in it.
05.18.07 @ 11:17PM | Unregistered CommenterJacq
Coffee has fiber in it??!! Shit, that's what's going on. Gotta run...
05.18.07 @ 11:38PM | Unregistered CommenterCarol Anne
Thanks for the link and mention to my "Conversation" with my cup of coffee. I had to click on it and read it again.

Shame on Peter for missing a post.

I agree - chocolate and coffee ARE made for each other. I love mocha coffee - especially the frozen ones in the summer.

By the way - coffee and Bailey's Irish Creme are made for each other too!!
05.19.07 @ 12:08AM | Unregistered CommenterHale McKay
Yeah, you're right, Juliette Binoche was brilliant too, but the chocolate and Johnny Depp are especially yummy!
05.19.07 @ 02:56PM | Unregistered CommenterTheresa

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