Airline travel is a hassle. You know it, I know it, everyone knows it. Homeland Security looks at everyone as if they are a potential killer. They take pleasure in divesting you of your snacks, luggage, and dignity. Delays are inevitable. There’s a risk you’ll never make it to your flight or get bumped at the last minute. The seats are tiny, the food is lousy (or used to be, when there was any), and there’s always the chance of real trouble. So why do we keep doing it? Because usually the alternative is not going. Although it may take a whole day to fly from one side of the US to the other, it’s still faster than driving for days. Personally, I’d prefer the driving, but I can’t afford the few days or the gas!



Pre-Flight Safety Announcement (via Arbroath)

Furniture made from aviation salvage.

Dark Roasted Blend has a collection of “oops” moments at airports. All are presumed to be quite expensive.

Top Ten Secrets of Air Travel Insiders.

How to sleep on a plane.

What to do if your flight is cancelled.

Top 10 ugliest commercial airplanes ever. (via Dark Roasted Blend)

What do you do when your Boeing 767 runs out of fuel in midair? This is not a hypothetical question; it happened in 1983.

THE GATE

(via Phil’s Phun)
A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets.

As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket, and he opened his trench coat and flashed her.

Without missing a beat she said,

"Sir, I need to see your ticket, not your stub."

BABY PLANES

(via Hoss posting at It’s a Raggedy Life)
A mother and her young son were flying Southwest Airlines from K-City to Chicago. The little boy, who had been looking out the window, turned to his mother and said, "If big dogs have baby dogs, and big cats have baby cats, why don't big airplanes have baby airplanes?"

The mother couldn't think of an answer. So she told her child to ask the flight attendant. So the boy went down the aisle and posed his question.

The attendant smiled and said, "Did your Mom tell you to ask me?"

"Yes, she did," replied the boy.

"Well, then," said the attendant, "you go and tell your mother that there are no baby airplanes because Southwest always pulls out on time.

"Have your Mom explain that to you."

CESSNA

NEWS FLASH! - Tennessee's worst air disaster occurred when a small two-seater Cessna 150 plane, piloted by two University of Kentucky students, crashed into a cemetery earlier today. Search and Rescue workers have  recovered 300 bodies so far and expect the number to climb as digging continues into the evening.

The pilot and copilot survived and are helping in the recovery efforts.

The Airline from Hell (via Dark Roasted Blend)

Thought for today: If God had meant man to fly, He'd have given him lots more money.

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