Links For Everyone!
Sunday, 05.14.06 @ 12:26AM 
Remember I told you about the trials I went through to get my cable internet installed? I had jumped through hoops to get an appointment. Ten days later on a Saturday, I stayed home for four hours straight waiting for them. An hour past the appointed window, I called. After going through six people who couldn’t understand my problem, I was told there never was an appointment scheduled for me. The woman I thought was an angel for helping me just told me what I wanted to hear and never did a thing. Ten days wasted.
So they shifted me through a couple more people in order to make another an appointment. Do I want an install for $49, or do I want a “trouble call”, which is $35 an hour. He said I’d save money that way, because it wouldn’t take them an hour. OK. This time is was easier to schedule them, because I am unemployed a woman of leisure.
They came on Monday. Two of them. They found a bad signal in my cable at the computer, at the modem, at the TV splitter, in the basement, and at the point of entry. They replaced all the ends of all the cable segments, and made small talk about my scary basement-on-a-slant and our various kids and grandkids. But they got my cable internet working! Then they presented me with a bill for $179. That $35 an hour was for EACH of the two, and they were there about two hours. Plus parts.
Lucky for me, I am an unemployed radio star widow with two twice-orphaned daughters, so the bill was changed to zero. Sometimes things just work out.
The trials and tribulations of the poor stick figure who poses for the warning signs.
Game: Drive like a Kennedy. (via Arbroath) I would’ve scored higher if I weren’t laughing all the way through it!
Tom Cruise’s new baby. Don’t watch this while drinking.
Racing Grannies, the best wind-up toy ever invented.
The Masturbatathon is coming... May 27th.
How to make coffee using an Aeropress device. Is it just me, or does it seem to take a huge amount of coffee to make one cup?
The Booby Match Game.
Hail to the Chief played with no instrument. I almost said “played with hand farts”.
SHE’S OVERDUE
Husband comes home one night, and his wife throws her arms around his neck: "Darling, I have great news: I'm a month
overdue. I think we're going to have a baby! Until the doctor confirms the test result we can't tell anybody."
The next day, a guy from the electric company rings the door-bell, because the couple hasn't paid their last bill:
"Are you Mrs. Smith? You're a month overdue, you know!"
"How do YOU know?" stammers the young woman.
"Well, ma'am, it's in our files!" says the man.
"What are you saying? It's in your files?????"
"Absolutely."
"Well, let me talk to my husband about this tonight."
That night, she tells her husband about the visit, and he, mad as a bull, rushes to the electric company's office the first thing the next morning.
"What's going on here? You have it on file that my wife is a month overdue? What business is that of yours?" the husband shouts.
"Just calm down," says the clerk, "it's nothing serious. All you have to do is pay us."
"PAY you? and if I refuse?"
"Well, in that case, sir, we'd have no option but to cut yours off."
"And what would my wife do then?" the husband asks.
"I don't know. I guess she'd have to use a candle."
To the left is an actual ad for an actual candidate for sheriff of Martin County, KY. (Thanks, Joe!)
Along the same lines, here’s a trip down Memory Lane, the Li’l Abner website. (lifted from the Erudite Redneck)
Bibi’s Box has posted a bunch of vintage cartoons, like Krazy Kat, Felix the Cat, and Betty Boop!
One of the Seven Deadly Sinners received a lovely Cyclops Kitten as a gift!
How to cast and save a snowflake permanently.
Can you imagine getting a master’s degree in animation? How fun! But WE get to enjoy the thesis.
A priest, and imam, and a rabbi met for a game of soccer... its no joke, a bunch of them did, in Berlin. Read the story to see who won! 
Hall of Technical Documentation Weirdness.
The AV Club’s Summer Movie Preview.
The Five Most Common Business Lies.
Top Ten Creepiest Childrens TV Shows.
How NOT to write a school paper.
Wal*Mart is in a legal dispute over the rights to the smiley face.
Rate My Turban. Just what it says.
Funny remixes of The Skeletor Show. There’s a whole series of these, with more episodes coming. You’ll find them here.
Levitation made easy. Well, maybe not easy, but here’s how to do it. (via Arbroath)
Cheryl at Mad baggage had this link that I couldn’t copy, you’ll see why, if you go there... but you might not want to.
Look what Gothgrrl made for me in her Kids Pix program for Mother's Day!
This was accompanied by a homemade card which read " to my Dearest Mother from your daughter I love you Mommy with my hole And your pretty Your a pretty princess." Later on, she explained that the line was supposed to be "with my whole heart." Alrighty then. It brought a smile to my face in more ways than one!
Thought for today: I am becoming increasingly worried that there isn't enough anxiety in my life.
humor jokes video funny games
Reader Comments (9)
Happy Mother's Day! Hope it's a great day for you.
Radio star, eh? With the sense of humor displayed herein, the status of 'unemployed' is non sequitur...folks are missing the boat!
Your cable experience sounds a tad like my effort to get a phone when I first moved into my current digs (back in '00). An experience I wouldn't believe, save for the fact I lived it LOL. I'll probably re-run the column on it shortly.
Happy weekend, D (aka, Ms C).
Skunk
Another awesome post! I spend more time on your blog than anyone else's. It is SO entertaining. I love the variety and the links!
So when do you start doing audio for ipods?
...Because of a comment you let over at Ivy the Goober's place, I finally realized the problem. I forgot to fix your URL on my blog roll. I still had the "blogspot" as part of your addy. Now I have some serious catching up to do on past posts.
...Strange, I usually get the white screen when there is a new site involved. The more I know about computers (and women) I find there's less I really know.