Journalism
Tuesday, 11.07.06 @ 12:09AM 
A lot of people are going to be glued to the tube, or the net, or the radio tonight for the election results. Personally, I haven’t watched news on TV in a couple of years. I have to deliberately make myself turn the radio on since I lost my job, but I try to catch the local news as I drop the kids off at school. My mother-in-law keeps me well informed of the local obituaries and scandals. I read the papers, but I usually get immediate news from the net. Now, Comedy Central has pulled all of the Daily Show clips from YouTube, as if thats going to make me purchase a premium cable plan (not gonna happen). You can still see Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert at the Comedy Central website a few days after it airs. I know if something outrageous happens on TV, I’ll eventually see it, and you can, too!
But don’t let these links or anything else keep you from going to the polls and casting your vote! You might think your vote won’t count, but thats only true if you don’t cast it! Every election affects parts of your life that you don’t even know about yet, and the lives of your children and grandchildren. When you vote, win or lose, you can say you did your part.
Monty Python’s Silly Election Results
Who are the most trusted news anchors on TV? Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert, of course!
Pandas just LOVE this reporter!
Do you ever get the idea that some many journalists focus on style over substance?
Stomping grapes can make your feet drunk.
Personally, I heartily endorse the Katie Couric Photoshop diet.
Who’s the Most Annoying Asshole News Anchor on TV? I think you’re supposed to vote in the comments section.
A Guide to U.S. Newspapers
1. The Wall Street Journal is read by the people who run the country.
2. The New York Times is read by people who think they run the country.
3. The Washington Post is read by people who think they should run the country.
4. USA Today is read by people who think they ought to run the country but don't really understand the Washington Post. They do, however like the smog statistics shown in pie charts.
5. The Los Angeles Times is read by people who wouldn't mind running the country, if they could spare the time, and if they didn't have to leave L.A. to do it.
6. The Boston Globe is read by people whose parents used to run the country.
7. The New York Daily News is read by people who aren't too sure who's running the country, and don't really care as long as they can get a seat on the train.
8. The New York Post is read by people who don't care who's running the country either, as long as they do something really scandalous, preferably while intoxicated.
9. The San Francisco Chronicle is read by people who aren't sure there is a country, or that anyone is running it; but whoever it is, they oppose all that they stand for. There are occasional exceptions if the leaders are handicapped minority, feministic atheist dwarfs, who also happen to be illegal aliens from ANY country or galaxy as long as they are democrats.
10. The Miami Herald is read by people who are running another country, but need the baseball scores.
Unfortunate Juxtaposition Gallery
(click to enlarge)
END OF THE WORLD
When the End of the World Arrives, How Will the Media Report It?
USA Today: WE'RE DEAD
The Wall Street Journal: DOW JONES PLUMMETS AS WORLD ENDS
National Enquirer: O.J. AND NICOLE, TOGETHER AGAIN
Playboy: GIRLS OF THE APOCALYPSE
Microsoft Systems Journal: APPLE LOSES MARKET SHARE
Victoria's Secret Catalog: OUR FINAL SALE
Sports Illustrated: GAME OVER
Wired: THE LAST NEW THING
Rolling Stone: THE GRATEFUL DEAD REUNION TOUR
Readers Digest: 'BYE
Discover Magazine: HOW WILL THE EXTINCTION OF ALL LIFE AS WE KNOW IT AFFECT THE WAY WE VIEW THE COSMOS?
TV Guide: DEATH AND DAMNATION: NIELSON RATINGS SOAR!
Lady's Home Journal: LOSE 10 LBS BY JUDGEMENT DAY WITH OUR NEW "ARMAGEDDON" DIET!
America Online: SYSTEM TEMPORARILY DOWN. TRY CALLING BACK IN 15 MINUTES.
Inc. magazine: TEN WAYS YOU CAN PROFIT FROM THE APOCALYPSE
Microsoft's Web Site: IF YOU DIDN'T EXPERIENCE THE RAPTURE, DOWNLOAD SOFTWARE PATCH RAPT777.EXE.
There are tons of blooper compilations on the net, but this one made me laugh more than most.
Thought for today: Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot.
PS Much to my surprise, my picture is still hanging on at 25peeps. You can go over there and click on the blonde with glasses if you want to inflate my ego or something like that.
PPS Yes, I had a wonderful time on my trip! Sooner or later, I might write about it. I got some nice pictures of the kids, but my digital camera broke, and I’ll have to get someone else to retrieve the photos from the memory card. So thats a project for the future.
humor jokes video funny journalism news newspaper broadcasting bloopers
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Reader Comments (11)
Had to laugh at how it is surmised the end of the world would be reported on ;-)
Thank you for sharing a little humor with us on a daily basis. I appreciate it, and I'm sure a lot of other people do as well.
Journalism...there aren't any, anymore. Too many people are afraid of offending the fascistic elements on *both* sides of the aisle that they merely rehash a handout, and call it a day.
Except Keith Olbermann. He ought to be in the hall of fame already.
I will look forward to hearing about your trip. I have been on quite a trip myself, without going very far from home. Miss C, I think I have found HER and it has been wonderful. Stay on your quest as it sure is great when you finally do find the one you are looking for.
Victor in Florida