Mass Transit
Monday, 11.06.06 @ 12:09AM 
Everyone knows the benefits of public transportation: the reduction in traffic, lower maintenance costs for automobiles, fewer emissions, insurance savings, etc etc. That doesn’t neccesssarily make it fun. If you take the same train or bus every day, it may seem like an totally unpleasant interlude. Its all those other people’s fault, of course, for just being there with you. But to this rural soccer mom, any opportunity to not drive is a bonus! Looking out the window at the scenery is a treat for me, no matter how bad that scenery is.
The guys from b3ta asked for the story of the worst journey in the world. These ended up leaning heavily toward train rides in England. They are pretty awful, and pretty funny!
Sleepy Commuters
This Trainspotting Simulator is the strangest game you’ll see all day.
Yesbutnobutyes has a recurring feature from aquaman called Commuting Suicide, about the adventures of using public transportation in New York City.
Its the puppy monorail!
THE BUS #1
A bus filled with politicians was driving through the countryside one day, on the campaign trail. The bus driver, caught up in the beautiful scenery,loses control and crashes into the ditch. A farmer living nearby hears the horrible crash and rushes out to discover the wreckage. Finding the politicians, he buries them.
The next day, the police come to the farm to question the man. "So you buried all the politicians?" asked the police officer.
"Were they all dead?"
The farmer answered, "Some said they weren't, but you know how politicians lie."
THE BUS #2
A senior citizens' group charters a bus from Burlington, IA, to Branson, MO. As they entered Missouri, an elderly woman comes up to the driver and says, "I've just been molested!"
The driver felt that she had fallen asleep and had a dream. So he tells her to go back to her seat, and sit down.
A short time later, another old woman comes forward, and claims that she was just molested. The driver thought he had a bus load of old wackos, but who would be molesting those old ladies?
About 10 minutes later, a third old lady comes up and says that she'd been molested too.
The bus driver decides that he'd had enough, and pulls into the first rest area. When he turns the lights on and stands up, he sees an old man on his hands and knees crawling in the aisles.
"Hey gramps, what are you doing down there?" says the bus driver.
"I lost my toupee. I thought I found it three times, but every time I try to grab it..., it runs away...!!"
Japanese Subway: Can we get one more on?
IN THE SUBWAY CAR
The subway car was packed. It was rush hour, and many people were forced to stand. One particularly cramped woman turned to the man behind her and said, "Sir, if you don't stop poking me with your thing, I'm going to call the cops!"
"I don't know what you're talking about miss, that's just my pay check in my pocket."
"Oh really," she said. "Then you must have some job, because that's the fifth raise you've had in the last half hour.
Thought for today: Somebody shoot me, I think to myself. As I notice the seedy characters outside the bus, I realize somebody might. -aquaman
humor jokes video funny games subway train bus commuter mass transit
Reader Comments (7)
Before that, I lived in Maryland. I drove the beltway every day for about 45 minutes one way to work, and then drove it at night to College Park in the traffic after work to get to class. Yea. That was fun. So no, I don't feel bad rubbing it in to my friends that I only have a skip to work. I remember how it USED to be.