The Penguin Post

TODAYS HEADLINES

 
Penguin used for slave labor!

Penguin Film as Political Fodder!

A Gay Penguin ran for office in 2004 and you missed it!

If you are a penguin, and you wear blue shoes, of course you’d go by the name Elvis!  (via Arbroath)

Scientists develop Lunar Penguin Robot!

SPORTS

Play penguin baseball!

Extreme penguin baseball!

Penguin Shuffleboard!

Penguin Handball!

Penguin target practice! Fun when you finally hit one!

OPINION

Ellen Goodman on the latest penguin controversy!

TRAVEL

Traveling the world with stuffed penguins!

ENTERTAINMENT

Garrison Keillor can take one lame penguin joke and turn it into a whole radio show!

Pictures of Lego penguins.

Penguin Jokes!

A dirty penguin joke! 

And a Penguin joke you won�t get!

MOVIES AND TV

 The penguin movie Happy Feet will be out November 17th. Here’s the official site. Here’s the trailer.

Penguin chasing a monkey with a chainsaw!

The famous evil penguin!

And the sequel!

Cartoon short: Graham the Penguin!

Jumpstart is a cute animation starring an ostrich and a penguin. (via the Presurfer)

TOP 5 PENGUINS

1. Opus
2. Chilly Willy
3. The Entire Cast of "March of the Penguins"
4. Tux the Linux penguin
5. Bud Ice penguin

ADVERTISEMENT

Drink Little Penguin Wine. Take the Little Penguin Politics survey. And maybe adopt a penguin.

A penguin walks into a bar, and asks the bartender if he has any plums. The bartender, confused, tells the penguin that no, his bar doesn't serve plums. The penguin thanks him and leaves.

The next day, the penguin returns, and again repeats his request for plums. Again, the bartender tells him that, no, the bar does not serve plums, has never served plums, and, furthermore, will never serve plums. The penguin, a little ruffled, thanks him and leaves.

The next day, the penguin returns, but before he can say anything, the bartender begins to yell: "Listen, penguin! This is a bar! We do not serve plums! If you ever ask for plums again, I will nail your stupid penguin beak to the bar!" The penguin is silent for a moment, and then asks, ''Do you have any nails?'' Confused, the bartenders says "No."

"Good!" says the penguin. "Then do you have any plums?"

Lots more penguin links and information!


This is so weird, I don't even know where to put it.




Misscellania definition
Polarize: What penguins see with.

This post was inspired by my friend Dawn in Louisiana.

adopt your own virtual pet!

Thought for today: "I have often had the impression that, to penguins, man is just another penguin - different, less predictable, occasionally violent, but tolerable company when he sits still and minds his own business." - Antarctic explorer Bernard Stonehouse

The original version of this post appeared on October 27, 2005.

Search penguin humor penguin humor

Comments

[Anonymous]

So weird you don't even know where to put me?

Why thanks.... there is no higher compliment :)

And thanks for the link :)

Sacred Chao

[Saskboy]

If you click detux enough, he falls off the ice.

[RockyJay]

I don't like Penguins, because male penguins are totally pu**y whipped.

I saw that Penguin movie and females left their males to watch over the egg while they went "having fun" like swimming. If that's not pu**y whipped, nothing is!

I hate to pitch this idea, but perhaps feminists should adapt Penguin as their symbol...

[Skunkfeathers]

LOL...the male penguin may be "p****whipped", but while they're hatching the omelette, Free Willie is eating their galpals.

Talk about strange relationships ;-)

[se7en]

That's a whole lotta tuxes that need dry cleaning, I wonder where they get 'em done! hehe

[Jacq]

Oh man, was that cute! Especially about the global warming/hot flashes! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

[Serena Joy]

Everything you ever wanted to know about penguins -- I love it!

[Joe St John]

Tux, the Linux penguin, is my hero. He's also the star of a whole bunch of Linux games like TuxRacer... which occupy far too much of my free time!

[Joel]

Well, swat my hind with a melon rind!
(Dat's a penguin state of mind.)